A number of clients say to me, “I just can’t relax”.
On close questioning it often transpires that their strategy for relaxation is to just stop the activity they have been engaged in and wait for the feeling of relaxation to arrive.
Unsurprisingly, when the relaxation vibe doesn’t quickly emerge, there can be a feeling of anxiety about not being able to relax, which compounds the situation.
The problem is often the expectation of how quickly and easily one should be able to relax, especially when leisure or down time is sparse.
But if we look at it again, expecting to relax immediately after quitting our work, is about as likely in the start as walking through the door of the new gym with your new kit, and expecting to be supple and fit.
Relaxation is a habit, and it has a strategy like everything else. Perhaps it’s not the same for everyone, but it definitely requires a little thought, patience and technique.
Top tips for relaxation.
Ease off on the expectation of being able to relax straight away. It can take time to develop your own techniques, and even the awareness of this can really help.
Remember your body has chemicals to help you keep going or to deal with stress. Hormones such as adrenalin and cortisol will linger until the relaxation kicks in.
Consider your posture and muscle memory. How are you holding your body and where is the effort or stress being felt most? Shake it out and move your body in a different way compared with how you hold yourself when you are active or stressed. This means if you have a sedentary job, take a walk. If you’re stood up all day, recline, or whatever works for you.
Practice, build up a habit of relaxation. It’s great to get into a routine for relaxation, be it meditation, snoozing, light exercise or anything that suits you. The important point is that it can take time to get a strategy that works for you. You can relax, with the right approach put into practise.